Saying Goodbye

I have wanted to write a reflection blog since I got home, but I have not had a clue where to begin.  However, today I was asked a question that I think will help me write this.  Today we had a church picnic at Beaver Lake.  During this, Pastor asked us what moment God felt the most real to us (besides a death or birth).  My answer came to me immediately, but it surprised me as it was not something I had really reflected on. 

This moment happened for me my first Sunday in Haiti.  I was feeling a little discouraged because I had been there for a couple of days, and I had not really seen any familiar faces.  I was sitting in church and my eyes met the eyes of a little boy.  The little boy I had fallen in love with three years prior.  The little boy I had thought continuously about.  The little boy who changed my perspective on life.  The little boy who I wondered if I would ever see again.  I saw the realness of God in James’s smile (and my own) when our eyes met, and we realized we were together again.

This summer I saw James almost everyday.  I quickly became friends with his brother Niason, and towards the end of my trip I became friends with another brother Richie.  I have talked a lot about how much spending time with them meant to me, however, I do not think I realized the full extent of this until I had to leave.  I can easily say that leaving those two little boys behind was the hardest thing for me.  My last night there I found Niason and Josiah (the executive director’s son who I also fell in love with) and went to tell them goodbye.  I held it together and all was good until I went to walk away.  I had gotten maybe fifteen feet away, and both boys ran to me and buried their heads into my side crying.  I sat down on the ground and just cried with them.  In the middle of this, Niason slipped a bracelet off his wrist and onto mine.  I still wear it not just as a reminder of Haiti, but also as a reminder of the love I felt there and the friendships I made.  The three of us finally collected ourselves, but I still had to say goodbye to James.  I found him and said goodbye.  The tears that began rolling down his cheeks absolutely broke my heart.  As I sat there just holding him, I realized how much he truly meant to me.  I love this little boy with my whole heart, and nothing will ever change that.  While I am thankful that I was able to see how much I also meant to him, it made it that much harder to leave. I know I was not much of a comfort as I was bawling myself.  However, I needed him to hug me just as much as he needed me to hug him.

Not a day goes by where I do not wish I was back with these boys.  However, I rest in the peace of knowing that God is in control.  I know in my heart that I will be with them again.  It may not be as soon as I would like, but God’s timing is best.  He has more in store for me in Haiti, and I cannot wait to see what else He has planned.  I have learned so much and been changed in so many ways this summer.  However, I think the most impactful way is finally realizing that God truly does have it under control.  He makes the plan, and I merely need to follow it.  Right now He has shown me that His plan includes Haiti, and that is what I will continue working towards. 

Thank you so much for your support, prayers, and encouragement this summer.  I cannot describe how much you all have meant to me during this journey.  I do not think that I could have done it without you.  

My Last Day

Well I've been putting off blogging. I keep telling myself I don't want to spend the time on it, however, truthfully I just want to stay in denial about leaving. Today is my last day in Haiti. How crazy is that? I feel like I got off the plane yesterday. This has easily been the best summer of my life. I have changed, grown, and most importantly increased my relationship with Christ. I am so very thankful for this opportunity. 

This week has been full of "lasts."  My last time going to Bonneau, my last time going to the market, my last time going to Ansefalour, my last Bible Study. This has definitely given me a different perspective on things. I have felt like I have needed to cherish each moment even more. Thankfully, God has given me many moments to cherish. I have been able to spend a lot of time loving on and being loved be my friends outside the mission and inside the mission. I am going to miss my boys outside, James and Niason, the Miriam Center kids, and so many more. Yesterday I was able to revisit the baby in Ansefalour. The baby has been sick, so I was able to pray with him and his mom. I was so glad I got to see them again! 

My real story, and the thing that got me to blog, is the boys Bible study. Tuesday, one of the group members lead a great Bible study where the boys were able to talk about their hopes and dreams. It was so cool to hear what they want to do and to realize they have dreams just like everyone else. Well yesterday I was able to lead Bible study. I shared my testimony with the boys about how going to church and loving God isn't what will get you to Heaven. I shared about having to have the specific moment where you ask God to come into your heart. After I shared my story, I asked if anyone hadn't had that moment but wanted to. My friend Kiki raised his hand. It was such and honor and blessing to be able to walk him through the Romans Road and pray with him. I am so incredibly excited, and I know the angels are rejoicing with me! 

Well I am off to spend my last day in Haiti. It is incredibly bittersweet, but I am looking forward to seeing what incredible things God has in store for today!

The Little Things

Today I received a note that meant something indescribable to me.  The note said:

"From: Jims To: Torey I love you Torey.  Today give me a big hug.  If you dont give me a big hug than you will be in big truble.  Frend for life.  Win are you going to go home.  I love you Torey so much.  You were sick and you dint tell me.  I pray for you.  You pray for me.  Bey bey."


This note is from James, or Jims, my very first Haitian friend.  It seems like just yesterday that I was getting off the bus from Ansefalour, and I saw him for the first time.  Being able to continue my relationship with him has been the biggest blessing this summer.  I cannot believe how much he has grown up these past three years.  This note meant the world to me because it showed me that I meant as much to him, as he means to me.  This little note written on a ripped up paper with crayon is the greatest treasure I will take home from Haiti with me.

Early Monday morning the groups left.  They took with them half of our interns.  It seems so quiet here without the groups, and it also feels like a piece of us is missing without the interns.  I already miss them like crazy, but I am so thankful I was able to spend the summer with them.

Today was such a fun day for the interns that are left.  Melonnie (the travel coordinator) told us about a hike she wanted us to go on.  She told us it was going to be super easy, more like a walk.  We went, and it was beautiful.  However, we spent the whole time walking on mud and wet rocks which were extremely slippery.  Melonnie was the first one to wipe out, and it all went downhill from there.  Kelly wiped out next and landed on a thorn bus.  Caitlin asked her if she had thorns in her butt, and we all cracked up deeming that as something you only ask in Haiti.  At one point, we were on a really steep part.  Morgan started sliding down and yelled "nooo, I didn't want to fall!!" On the same slope, I started sliding which made Caitlin slide.  Instead of being a gentleman and helping, Spencer moved out of the way.  I am pretty sure everyone fell, slipped, or tripped multiple times throughout the trip.  I also fell once we were back on the main road.  The Haitians thought it was hilarious, and one girl followed me announcing I was the girl who just fell.  I truly do not think that I have ever laughed as hard as I did today.  When we got back, we were able to eat a delicious meal at a restaurant about forty minutes away.  The food was amazing, but the company was even better.  I am so thankful for this group of people that have become my family.

I cannot believe I only have ten days left in Haiti.  It seems so crazy to me that my time is coming to an end.  I feel like I just got here to start my summer.  Today I was reminded of the greatest of God in all the little things.  From a note, to laughter, to yummy food, to silly songs, to beautiful sunsets, to passing a revival on the way home.. God is in everything.  This country, full of evil and darkness, is even more full with the greatness of the one and true God, and oh how He loves us.  My challenge for you is to seek Him in the little things.

Restore Retreat

Well my mother informed me it was time to blog, so here I am. This week has been crazy but so much fun! This group is called the "Restore Retreat" so it has been like a conference on top of a mission trip. I have really enjoyed the times of worship, prayer, and fellowship. 

Apart from the devotion times, we have also been going out to different sites. The other day we went to Ansefalour. I was able to return to the house that had the new baby. The baby was doing great, as was the mother. It meant a lot to me to be able to continue the relationship with them. I felt like it helped them understand that we really do care about them. We are not going to meet them once and forget about them. 

My group was originally supposed to go to La Baie, which is my favorite campus. They then decided to go to the Beauchamp campus. I can't lie, I was pretty upset because I was really looking forward to going to La Baie. However, it ended up a couple of other interns were already going to Beauchamp, and they took my group. I was able to tag along with another group going to La Baie. I had so much fun there. We were able to eat lunch in different families from the community's houses. It was an amazing opportunity to experience more of true Haitian culture. At La Baie campus, there are fourteen orphans. I had already fallen in love with Kenny, when he was at the baby orphanage in Saint Louis. By the time we left today, I was in love with all fourteen. They were the sweetest kids ever, and they had the biggest personalities. They were so excited to show us how they could count to ten in English. You could clearly see how much they craved for attention, and I'm so thankful I was able to go love on them. We took them to the playground that the church helped build, and seeing their faces light up was something indescribable. 

My time is quickly coming to an end. As much as I miss my family, I am not ready to leave at all. These people have given me such a different appreciation on life in general. I am going to miss this place so very much. uch a different appreciation on life in general. I am going to miss this place so very much.

The Blessings of Typhoid

Well I figured it's past time to blog again. I feel like I don't have anything to blog about though. The day my mom left, I woke up with horrible stomach cramps. I had them all day, but I didn't think much about it. I went to bed early and woke up around 10pm. I felt like I had no energy whatsoever. I didn't even feel like I could keep my eyes open. Someone got Lisa for me, and she took me down to our urgent treatment clinic. The nurses put an iv in me and gave me some Motrin. They put me in a room to sleep and a couple hours later the fever started. I was lying awake in this unairconditioned room with an iv, and I was scared to death. I had no idea what was going on, or why I felt so bad. I reached a level of having to rely on God that I have never reached before. The next morning they took my blood and discovered I had typhoid and anemia. 

In all honesty, I couldn't have gotten sick at a better time. We have been on a break, so we had no groups here on campus.  At first, I was bummed about being left on campus while the other interns went out to do things, but it has been a blessing in disguise. I have been able to connect with some of the staff members here, and I would not have had that opportunity if I had not been sick. I was also able to rest and recover from the craziness of the last group. 

While I am thankful for the chance to rest, I was beyond excited to finally get off campus the other day. We went to Ansefalour and went to some of the different voodoo sights. We went to the place where the rainbow serpent lives. We also went into the house of spirits, or what I would call a big bat cave. It amazes me how people can put their faith in things that seem so bizarre to me. I am glad we went because I feel like it is important to understand the spiritual warfare we are up against. It is eyeopening to be in a country where spiritual warfare is so prevalent. I know we have it at home, but it is not as blatantly obvious as it is here. 

Throughout the summer, the interns have been participating in survivor. We have two different teams and have been doing challenges all summer. Yesterday, we had two challenges. The first was we drew a number and were given that number plate. We had to eat whatever was on our plate, and the first team done won. My team lucked out, and our plates were a sandwich, cookies, and cheese. The other team had spam, fish, and Cheetos. Of course, my team won! The second challenge was super gross. We had to partner up with someone from the other team. We had a tube with a raw egg in the middle. We had to blow the end of the tube until someone got egg sprayed on them. I argued the fact my lung capacity was down from being sick, but I still had to compete. I lost, but I ended up spraying my opponent (Spencer) with the raw egg. Even though I lost, he was one with egg all over his clothes. It made losing worth it! While the challenges are sometimes gross, they have been a lot of fun and allowed the interns to bond together. 

We have a couple more days before the next group gets here. I am looking forward to spending time with the interns and staff, but I am really excited for the next group to get here! I am sad that I only have two groups left this summer, but I am excited to pour out into them. I ask for your prayers for the health of all the interns and staff as our summers are wrapping up. Thank you for all the encouraging notes I have gotten this last week. They have definitely made being sick a little easier!

The Trials of Heartbreak

Today I am blogging with a heavy heart. I feel like this past week has been a week full of trials and heartbreak. I cannot tell you if I have been surrounded by more heartbreak than usual, or if I have just been more attuned to it.  This week I have been blessed and honored to serve along side my mom, Mrs. Tolliver, and Cameron. They did some amazing things while they were here.

 On Saturday, we headed to a little town called Berger to do a medical clinic. My mom, Mrs. Tolliver, a nursing student, and another doctor saw close to 300 patients. Cameron and I were the "pill pushers" and traffic directors. I had such an incredible time watching my mother work. However, the thing I enjoyed the most was being able to use my little Creole to communicate with the patients coming in. It broke my heart though when I asked a little girl where her mom was, and she said she didn't have a mom. I don't know why that impacted me the way it did, but I know I will never forget the sadness in that little girl's eyes. 

On Monday we went to Ansefalour. We hiked up to the monument, walked through the base of the voodoo temple, and spent some amazing time in prayer for the city and the people. After lunch, we split up into two groups. Half of the group went to the beach to do a VBS, and half of the group went to do medical hut to huts. God led us to a house where a lady had had a baby five hours prior to us coming. My mother was able to examine the baby and tell the new mother what a beautiful healthy little girl she had. One of the last houses we stopped at had a woman who told us her husband was in the Port-de-Paix prison. The majority of the group had been to the prison ministering and helping medically just a couple days before. The woman had such a look of relief wash over her face when they told her that. For me, the instant connection that was made was such a God thing. There is no way of telling if they came in contact with her husband, but I am sure it was a relief to the woman to know that people also cared about her husband. 

Yesterday is the day that really got to my heart. Most of you know about the relationship my father has with the boy named Kenzie. It has been amazing this week to watch my mom also be able to connect with him. Yesterday Kenzie took us to his house to meet his mother. Kenzie is the youngest of five boys, and his father died a little before we came on our first trip. Kenzie now lives alone with his mother. Kenzie's mother showed us the tumor growing in her throat. Currently, it is not blocking her airway, but it will not take long. She met with an American surgery team at the mission, but they told her they could not help her. She is in a lot of pain. My heart broke. It just does not seem fair to me. Kenzie is such a good kid, and he's already been through enough losing one parent.  What is going to happen to him when he also loses his mom? I'm not really sure how to express how I feel about this, but I do ask for prayers for both Kenzie's family and my own as we are trying to figure out the best way to help, if we can at all.

Six Weeks

Six weeks ago today, I was sitting in the airport about to embark on a journey that would forever change my life. I was extremely excited but nervous beyond belief. In six short weeks, this country has become my home. The people, the interns, the missionaries have become my family. These six weeks have not always been easy, but they have been the most rewarding six weeks of my life. I have learned so much about myself, my Savior, and about His calling for my life.

As today marked six weeks, I did a lot of reflecting. I spent a lot of time with the boys outside. The boys that typically drive everyone crazy, including myself sometimes. I was able to talk to them, and a couple of them opened up about their lives. The fact that I have been able to build relationships like that with these boys, makes every challenging thing from these six weeks worth it. 

This week my mom brought me notes from a lot of the kids at church. She also brought me notes from my nursery babies. I miss them like crazy, but today I realized how much I am going to miss my kids here when I leave. It made me think of the Haitian proverb "timoun ki kriye nan kay ak sa ki kriye nan pot se menm.". This translates to "the child who cries in the house and the one who cries at the door are the same." It is easy to see the differences, but truly there are similarities between my nursery babies and the kids here. They all want love, they all have a Father who loves very much, and they all mean the world to me. 

I'm sure everyone is very interested in how things are going with my mother, Mrs. Tolliver, and Cameron here. I love that they are here. It is so cool to watch them find their niche but also watch them step out of their comfort zone. Cameron has fallen in live with the Miriam Center, Mom has seen more patients than I can count, and Mrs. Tolliver has sewn up more wounds and cuts than I would care to see in a lifetime.  I love being able to share a piece of my home with them. When they got here, I was so excited to show them everything. I was excited for them to meet my friends, and I was excited to watch them fall in love. All of these women have supported me the whole time, but I think now they truly realize why I am here. 

I can't believe six weeks have already gone by. I have five short weeks left, and I am starting to feel like eleven weeks was nowhere near long enough. Here the days feel like weeks, but the weeks feel like days. God has really challenged me today to take advantage of these next five weeks. I do not want to go home with any regrets. I am excited to see how He is going to use me, and I am excited to share that with my mom, Mrs. Tolliver, and Cameron this week. Please pray for them as they are being stretched to their max. I can't wait to see how God is going to change them.

My Intern Family :]

Now that the groups are gone, there is not a lot going on here.  I thought it would be fun to write a little about all of my fellow interns.  I am not sure where to start, so I will just start with who lives closest to me.

Spencer - Spencer or "50 Spenc" as his name tag says is also from Lexington.  I would have to describe him by his sense of humor.  If you know my mother, it is a lot like hers: very sarcastic.  Spencer definitely keeps things fun.

Sinclair - Sinclair is from Western Kentucky.  We joke that Sinclair is the perfect guy,  and many girls from different groups have asked about him.  Unfortunately for them, Sinclair is taken.  He is a great sport though, and he always lets us tease him.

Logan - Logan is really from Indiana, but I consider him another Kentuckian because he goes to KCU.  he is the most go with the flow person ever.  I am pretty sure that Logan is incapable of getting mad or being mean.  

Lisa - Lisa is from Tennessee.  She is the momma hen of the group.  Lisa is the medical intern, and her speciality is midwifery.  However, she knows how to take care of people from infants to elderly.

Kelsey - Kelsey is from Illinois.  I would say that she brings the spunk to the group.  Kelsey always has energy and is always willing to do something fun.  She is also usually the one coming up with crazy ideas or at least adding to them.

Caitlin - Caitlin is from West Virginia.  Unfortunately, she is spending the majority of the summer at the Mole.  This is Caitlin's third summer interning, so I pester her with a lot of questions.  Thankfully, she always seems happy to help.

Morgan - Morgan is from Missouri.  She is also interning primarily at the Mole.  Morgan is the most encouraging person ever.  Even from another campus, she makes sure that we are all doing well.  

Melissa - Melissa is from Florida.  The Haitians call her "Ti Blanc" or little white.  She might be little, but she is strong.  I will never forget when the nurse gave her four lidocaine shots.  Melissa could not walk and was throwing up, but she just laughed.

Allison - Aly is from Texas.  She is the Miriam Center intern, and she has a heart of gold.  She is extremely patient, and you can tell how much she loves the kids of the Miriam Center.

Kelly - Kelly is from California.  I feel like I can talk to all of the interns, however, Kelly is always there to listen to me.  She listens when I am happy, sad, frustrated, and so much more.  She is always willing to help: me, the groups, or the Haitians.

As you can tell, we all come from different places and are very different people.  It amazes me to see how God orchestrated us all being here this summer.  While we are all different, our weaknesses are each other's strengths.  I love this group of interns, and I could not be happier to serve along side of them.  I have no doubt in my mind that I have already made some friendships that will last a very long time.  We have become more than friends here, but rather a family.  We are hardly halfway through our summer, and we have made so many memories.  We have some good ones, some bad ones, and a lot of funny ones.  I love spending time with each and every one of my new family members.

My God Is Mighty To Save

Yesterday was an adventure.  In truth, everyday in Haiti is an adventure.  The interns have coined the phrase "Bien Veni Ayiti" or "Welcome to Haiti."   We use it whenever something happens that would only happen in Haiti.  For example, it was said the other day when I hung my freshly washed skirt to dry, and a bird pooped on it.  Well yesterday was filled with a lot of these moments.  We went to Ansefalour and hit roadblock after roadblock.  It led to a lot of frustration for me.  However on the way home, I just felt at peace about everything.  If something good was not happening in Ansefalour, the devil would not be fighting us.  He would not be creating all of these roadblocks if hearts were not being changed.  Now to the adventure part.  On the way home, one of the tires on our tap tap blew up.  Our driver decided to keep driving.  When the driver turned the truck off to coast down the mountain, the girls in my group started to get scared.  They started to sing "Jesus, Take the Wheel" which was actually a little comical to me.  Then the truck completely stopped.  The driver opened the hood, and oil was spewing everywhere.  He tried to fix this by beating on the engine with a rock and tying a vine around it.  Needless to say, it took five minutes for us to break down for good.  The mission sent a new truck, and we eventually made it home.  Boy was I glad to be home.

I also feel the need to blog about how I have been blessed by the Miriam Center this week.  The Miriam Center is our home for special needs children.  I recognize that I do not have the gift of working with the children of the Miriam Center.  It is simply not my forte.  A couple of days ago my group took some of the children to our special needs playground.  While we were there, I was feeling very homesick and simply out of place.  I took my bible and went by myself to pray.  While I was praying, Jilbert, a special needs boy came up to me and asked what was wrong.  Before I could say anything, he gave me a big hug.  I cannot express what went through my head, but my eyes were definitely opened. then the next day, Joseph, another special needs boy, grabbed my hand and painted my nails.  What a humbling experience.  I just feel completely blessed and humbled by these amazing children.

I want to finish this blog by talking about something I am surrounded by each and every day.  Miracles.  How cool is it to be living in a place where you can see miracles each and every day?  A couple days ago my group went to do grocery ministry.  We went to the market, picked out some food, and let God lead us to a house.  The house he led us to said they hadn't eaten in three or four days.  I have no doubt in my mind that God led us to their house.  They needed food, and through Him, we were able to provide it.  We also had our plans changed the day we were supposed to go to the brothel.  We had everything planned, but the girls were asleep.  Instead of wasting away the morning, my group went to the town square and sang and played guitar.  It is an incredible experience to sing "My God is Mighty to Save" in the center of Saint-Louis-du-Nord.  It was a moment that I will never forget.  Today, a couple of people climbed to the top of the church.  It was breathtaking to look out on all of God's creation.  To see the mountains beyond mountains and the beautiful blue ocean that my God created.  I just loved seeing the beauty, even in the midst of such hardships.  I love this country, I love the people, and I am so thankful that God sent me here this summer.  Thank you for your prayers and your words of encouragement.  They mean the world to me!

Big Expectations

What a crazy week!  I want to start with our Mole trip.  I had so much fun.  The Mole was absolutely beautiful, and it was great to get away for a couple days.  We spent a lot of time at the beach, and we just hung out and relaxed.  My favorite part of our Mole trip was the lesson in voodoo that we got.  Jodi Castillo shared some of the history and some of her personal experiences with voodoo.  The stories brought me to tears.  I feel like I understand the culture so much more.  I was raised going to Sunday School, and a lot of these children were raised going to voodoo rituals.  It is ingrained in their heads as the thing to put their faith in.  It really reminded me how important ministering to the children is.  

The new groups have come in, and things have been crazy busy.  We had about 140 peoplecome in one night.  I learned the definition of an imtern: running around like a chicken with its head cut off while answering a million questions. It was stressful at the time, but it was kind of funny looking back on it.  I definitely understand why we were told to pray for patience and unconditional love.  

I was talking with one of the missionaries the other day, and he really challenged me.  He talked about how easy it is to get comfortable and put our faith in a little God with little expections.  However, our God is a big God with big expectations.  We need to wake up every morning asking God to do something huge: something we cannot do without Him.  God had me step out of my comfort zone today.  The mission has an agreement with the biys outside the gate.  The boys are allowed to sell bracelets if they attend a Bible study.  Well today was time for the Bible study, and no one had prepared anything.  I jumped up and said I would do it, and within five minutes I was in front of the boys.  I had nothing prepared and was way out of my comfort zone.  However, I was able to share with them Romans 12:12 and what thay verse meant to me.  More importantly, God really revealed to me how much I love those boys while I was up there.  I knew I loved them, but I did not realize the extent of that until I was up there.  They are one of the reasons why I am here.

Unfortunately the power is about to go off, so I must go.  I miss everyone dearly.  Thank you for your prayers!

Highs and Lows

These last couple of days have been filled with ups and downs.  If you are friends with my mom on facebook, you probably saw that I helped deliver a baby!  It was an amazing experience.  However, I am fairly certain I never want to witness it again.  The lady I helped was 18, and she delivered her baby with no medication.  She spent the majority of her time in labor in a room with no air conditioning.  This lady hardly made a peep during the whole process. I definitely have a new definition of strength.  Although I felt a little quesy during the birth, being able to hold and pray over the baby girl moments after she was born is something I will never forget.

Unfortunately, I sae the other end of the spectrum today.  We were hanging out upstairs when we heard screams coming from the clinic downstairs.  We all went downstairs, and there was a woman wailing.  The interpreters told us her husband had just died.  It was absolutely heartbreaking to see. One of the interns said, "it is amazing how hard death can be evem when you do not know the person."  That is so true.  My heart breaks and my prayers go out for that woman.

This morning was also tough as our first group left. One of the interns had to return home for a wedding, and saying goodbye was a lot harder than I thought it would be.  I am amazed at how this group of staff has become like a family.  However, I did have a wonderful morning with the staff.  Today was James's birthday.  A couple of us went to a little Haitian resturant wih James and his brother.  I loved spending time with him, and growing closer to the other staff.

Tomorrow morning we are headed to the Mole for a couple days.  I am excited to see this new ministry, but it is going to be a long seven and a half hours on the back of a military truck.  I will update you when I return!

Be Still

He says, "be still, and know that I am God, I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." 

I knew that living in Haiti for the summer was going to be crazy.  I knew that it would be filled with ridiculously long days with a neverending list of things to do.  However, I did not realize how much of an opportunity I would have to be still and know that He is God.  I cannot describe how amazing it is to wake up every morning and know that I am doing God's Will.  I am right where He currently wants me to be.  That blows my mind.  Even though things are crazy, I am away from all the distractions that keep me from listening to that still small voice. I love that.  Another thing I love about being here is how dependent I am forced to be on Scripture. God's Word is where I find mmy hope and my strength to get through the day.  I love that I am forced to flip through my Bible seeking verses that will help me.

My first group is here.  They have been keeping me busy, and I have found it to be a lot more fun than I thought it would be.  It is differet in the way that on my previous trips I have been here to pour out into the Haitians.  I am still here to do that, but I am also responsibke for pouring out into my American group. I love being able to watch them fall in love with the country I have fallen in love with!

Today we went to House of Hope.  It is a home for children who are severly ill.  The majority of the children suffer from TB or extreme malnourishment. The goal of House of Hope is to nurse the children back to health so they can return to their families.  I loves being able to love on the children.  I was once again reminded how precious a child's laughter can be.

I must be going to bed, but I want to thank you for all the emails and comments.  They have encouraged me in an indescribable way!

Habakkuk

"Look at the nations and watch- and be utterly amazed.  For I am going to do something in your days that you would not believe, even if you were told." Habakkuk 1:5


This was the Lord's reply when Habakkuk cried out to Him.  Habakkuk said, "...How long Lord, must I call for help, but you do not listen...why do you make me look at injustice..."  What an amazing promise to someone who was struggling wih his calling.  I find such encouragement in this passage.  I have only been here around two weeks, but there are times when I am just like Lord, why am I here?  This passage showa me that even if I do not know why, God knows why I am here.  He is going to use me to do great things for His glory.

These last couple of days have been a blur.  This past weekend we went to Tortuga, Beauchamp, Salines Mayette, and La Baie.  I felt like I did not spend enough time at any of the places, but I had a great time at all of them.  Salines Mayette and La Baie are both orphanages.  These definitely hold a special place in my heart as these children are just like my sister.  At La Baie, I was able to reconnect with Kenny, a boy I fell in love with when he was in Saint Louis's baby orphange.  I have no idea if he remembered me, but being able to spend time with him was such a blessing.

So many amazing things are happening, and the groups are not even here! One of the staff members started raising money to buikd James's family a new home. In less than five days, he raised 10,000 dollars! James is getting a new home.. and hopefully this summer! There is a video on my facebook about it that is definitely worth watching!

Thank you everyone for you comments and emails.  They have been so encouraging! I love you all :]

Intern Training

I cannot believe I have been in Haiti a week!  It feels like I have been here forever, but at the same time it feels like I got here yesterday.

Training has been going good.  We have been traveling to the different places we will take groups and learning some of the history. We went to Ansefelour the other day.  We hiked up to the voodoo monument and went into the voodoo temple.  I have been there twice before, but I still get goosebumps.  The spiritual warfare is so real there.  We have also visited a couple jails and brothels in different towns.  Each one breaks my heart.  Today we went to Port-de-Paix.  My favorite part was when we toured a school.  The kids were chanting "blan" which means white, but they were so excited.  At one point I had more kids than I could count attached to me.  I love just being able to interact with them.

Speaking of interacting, my Creole is getting a little better.  We have had a couple of lessons, and the kids in the area have been a huge help.  However, I still have a long way to go.

We had quiet time at the waterfall yesterday. We all looked for verses that had to do with grace, compassion, patience, and unconditional love.  My prayer is that I will be filled with these qualities as we prepare for the incoming teams.  I am so excited for them, but I am very nervous at the same time!

I am missing all of my friends and family like crazy, but I know I could not be in a better place.  This is definitely the summer of a lifetime.

Saint-Louis-du-Nord

Bonswa from Haiti! Wow, I really have no idea were to begin. Right now I am definitely feeling overwhelmed, but that is okay because I know I am where I am supposed to be. So far we have really just been getting to know the staff and getting acclimated with campus. It has been two years since I have been here, and so much of campus has changed! Haiti sill seems the same: beauty and poverty intertwined. Today we went to church. I have to admit, it definitely made me miss Daybreak. However, It was breathtaking to see the people I love worshipping the God I love. I sat down in the church and made eye contact with a little boy. Smiles immediately came to both of our faces. It was James. For those of you who do not know, James is the little boy I fell in love with my first year. The second year he impressed me again, and truly changed my perspective on life. After church, I was able to spend some time with him which was a huge blessing for me. I also spent a lot of time with Kenzie, my dad's little boy. Of course he remembered my dad, and he kept asking me where "Lex" was. He told me to tell Lex he wants to see him again, and he is very excited to meet Lex's wife in July. Some of the interns and I walked through the town for a little bit today. The Haitian people are beautiful. One boy took us to his house where we talked to him and his father. His father could not stop saying how happy he was, and the boy told us it was the best day of his life. The boy gave me a painting. Once again a people I came to serve, served me. How do I even describe that? Well that is all I have time for now. Tomorrow we start a more intense training as we will be traveling to different sites. I am so excited to see what God has in store for me! I love you all, and I miss you like crazy! Thank you for your sweet comments; they have been so encouraging!

Greater Things Have Yet To Come

Five days.  Five days until I embark on a journey.  Five days until I start a summer that will forever shape the rest of my life.  Five days until I leave for Haiti.  I could not be more excited.  I have been dreaming of this internship since I returned from my last trip to Haiti two years ago.  I was sitting in history class when I received the email saying I had been accepted.  My professor and classmates probably thought I was crazy because I could not stop crying.  What an amazing opportunity my God has given me.

God has really been both working on my heart and preparing me for this trip this year.  My previous two trips to Haiti have indescribably changed me, and I have felt that change continue specifically this year.  I have felt God’s call to one day work internationally; however, I do not know exactly what that entails.  My Philosophy final this semester was a research paper about what our future plans are.  In the course of writing this paper, I came across a verse in Proverbs that says, “In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps” (Proverbs 16:9).  God has been establishing my steps, and I have no doubt that this trip is one of those steps.

God has been preparing me for this trip from little ways, like living in a dorm with no air conditioning, to big ways, like financially making it possible for me to go.  He also gave me the opportunity to go on a week long mission trip to Arlington, Texas during spring break.  Considering Texas is in the United States, I did not expect to receive assurance about my international call on my trip, but I was wrong.  At our second vacation bible school site, I became really close with four little boys.  I gave piggyback rides, colored pictures, made salvation bracelets, and played soccer all week with these boys.  I was blessed and challenged by these boys.  All four boys were from Africa.  In an area that consisted of children mainly from the United States, I connected with boys from Africa.  For me, this was God’s way of showing me He has a plan for my life, and it is in fact international.  There was another moment where God showed his almighty power to me.  I wrote about it in a reflective essay after my trip.

           

We were at worship one day, and we were singing the song “God of This City” by Chris Tomlin.  The song goes, “for greater things have yet to come, and greater things are still to be done in this city.”  The guy leading worship had us change this city to my city.  As we were singing this, Georgetown, Kentucky was not the city that I first thought of, nor was my hometown.  Saint-Louis-Du-Nord, Haiti was the city that was on my heart and became my prayer during this song.  God used this song to show me that He has greater plans for me than I could ever imagine.  This summer I will be spending eleven weeks in Saint-Louis-Du-Nord, and this short trip to Texas has prepared me in so many ways for this longer trip to Haiti.  I am ready and excited to see the great things that God will do in this city, in my city, this summer and in the future.  I am so thankful that I went to Texas, but I am even more thankful for God showing me a piece of His calling for my life during this spring break.

My trip to Texas was a blessing as it was a step God had laid out for me.  I know that this Haiti trip is the next step in His plan.  I ask for your prayers in the next five days as I prepare for my trip, and throughout the next eleven weeks as I seek God’s will for my life.